I got this in my e-mail-enjoy http://www.nonrev.net/infopop/emotic...on_biggrin.gif
These questions about Australia were posted on an Australian Tourism website and obviously the answers came from a fellow Aussie...
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Q: I have never seen it rain on Australian TV shows, so how do the plants grow? (UK)
A: We import all plants fully grown and then just sit around watching them die.
Q: Will I be able to see kangaroos in the street? (USA)
A: Depends how much you've been drinking
Q: I want to walk from Perth to Sydney-can I follow the railroad tracks? (Sweden)
A: Sure, it's only three thousand miles, take lots of water.
Q: Are there any ATMs (cash machines) in Australia? Can you send me a list of them in Brisbane, Cairns, Townsville and Hervery Bay? (UK)
A: What did your last slave die of?
Q: Can you give me information about hippo racing in Australia? (USA)
A: A-fri-ca is the big triangle shaped continent south of Europe. Aus-tra-lia is that big island in the middle of the Pacific which does not... oh, forget it. Sure, the hippo racing is every Tuesday night in King Cross. Come naked
Q: Which direction is north in Australia? (USA)
A: Face south and then turn 90 degrees. Contact us when you get here and we'll send the rest of directions.
Q: Can I bring cutlery into Australia? (UK)
A: Why? just use your fingers like we do
Q: Do you celebrate Christmas in Australia? (France)
A: Only at Christmas
Q: Are there killer bees in Australia? (Germany)
A: Not yet, but for you, we'll import them.
Q: Are there supermarkets in Sydney and is milk available all year round? (Germany)
A; No, we are a peaceful civilisation of vegan hunter gatherers, milk is illegal.
Q: I have a question about a famous animal in Australia, but I forget its name. It's a kind of bear and lives in trees. (USA)
A: It's called a Drop Bear. They are so called because they drop out of gum trees and eat the brains of anyone walking underneath them. You can scare then off by spraying yourself with human urine before you go out walking.
Q: Will I be able to speak English most places I go? (USA)
A: Yes, but you'll have to learn it first.
Q: Please send a list of all doctors in Australia who can dispense rattlesnake serum. (USA)
A: Rattlesnakes live in A-meri-ca which is where you come from. All Australian snakes are perfectly harmless, can be safely handled and make good pets.
Q: Can you send me the Vienna Boys Choir schedule? (USA)
A: Aus-tri-a is that quaint little country bordering Ger-man-y, which is...oh forget it. Sure, the Vienna Boys Choir plays every Tuesday night in Kings Cross, straight after the hippo races.
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Keep'em flying
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[This message was edited by Migflanker on April 25, 2003 at 06:51 PM.]
