Merry Christmas (2010)

Yes Virginia there is a non-rev “Night before Christmas”.
A Christmas tradition here in the forum
--with apologies to Clement C. Moore

Enjoy…. and Merry Christmas



The Night before Christmas-(Non-rev variation)

'Twas days before Christmas and there at the gate,
not a non-rev was stirring, all could but wait.
All held boarding passes securely in hand,
hoping against hope they wouldn't have to change plans.

When out on the tarmac I heard such a clatter,
I sprang from my chair to see what was the matter.
Away to the window I flew in a flash,
but slipped on spilled coffee and hit my head on the glass.

When what to my blurring eyes should appear,
but a blue maintenance truck, decorated with eight tiny reindeer.
With a driver so handsome so lively and quick,
I knew in a moment it must be a licensed mec-han-ic.

More rapid than eagles his comrades they came,
and he whistled and shouted, and called them by name:
"On, Mikey! On, RJ, On Howie and Vixen!
On, Comet! On Cupid! On Donder and Blitzen!"

To the left and the right to the undercarriage they flew,
in the steady advance of a well-practiced crew.
They spoke not a word, but went straight to their work,
and changed tire and brake then turned with a jerk.

Then quick as they came, his accomplices they rose,
"ready to roll Captain" were the words that he chose.
But I heard him exclaim as he drove out of sight,
Merry Christmas fellow non-revs and have a good flight."

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That... that's pretty epic :)

Another Christmas classic

Santa's Check ride

Santa Claus, like all pilots, gets regular visits from the Federal Aviation Administration, and the FAA examiner arrived last week for the pre-Christmas flight check.

In preparation, Santa had the elves wash the sled and bathe all the reindeer. Santa got his logbook out and made sure all his paperwork was in order. He knew they would examine all his equipment and truly put Santa's flying skills to the test.

The examiner walked slowly around the sled. He checked the reindeer harnesses, the landing gear and Rudolph's nose. He painstakingly reviewed Santa's weight and balance calculations for the sled's enormous payload.

Finally, they were ready for the check ride.

Santa got in and fastened his seat-belt and shoulder harness and checked the GPS. Then the examiner hopped in carrying, to Santa's surprise, a shotgun.

"What's that for?!?!" asked Santa in disbelief.

The examiner winked and said, I'm not supposed to tell you this ahead of time," as he leaned over to whisper in Santa's ear, "but you' re gonna lose number two on takeoff."

http://bestsmileys.com/christmas5/25.gif