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Handy household hints and timesavers
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1-- If you're chocking on an ice cube don't panic. Simply pour a cup of boiing water down your throat and presto-- the blockage will be almost instantly removed.
2-- Clumsy? Avoid cutting yourself while slicing vegetables by getting someone else to hold them while you chop away.
3-- For high blood pressure suffers: simply cut yourself and bleed for a few minutes, thus reducing the pressure in your viens. Just remember to use a timer.
4-- A mouse trap placed on your alarm clock will prevent you from rolling over and going back to sleep when you hit the snooze button.
5-- Don't waste money buying expensive binoculars. Simply stand closer to what you want to look at.
6-- (For you sci-fi fans) Create the effect of being abducted by aliens by drinking two bottles of vodka. You'll invariably wake up in a strange place the following morning; having had your memory mysteriously 'erased'.
7-- Have a bad tooth ache? Hit your thumb with a hammer, then you'll forget about the tooth ache.[/list]
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Sometimes we just have to remember what the rules of life really are...
You need only two tools: WD-40 and Duct Tape.
If it doesn't move and it should, use WD-40.
If it moves and shouldn't, use the duct tape.
Edited ( as usual) for spelling and stuff http://www.nonrev.net/infopop/emotic...on_biggrin.gif
Keep'em flying
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<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-title">quote:</div><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-content">Originally posted by Migflanker:
You should see my garden! http://www.nonrev.net/infopop/emoticons/icon_wink.gif
Keep'em flying </div></BLOCKQUOTE>
And who does the hom repairs?
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Welcome aboard James http://bestsmileys.com/waving/6.gif
<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-title">quote:</div><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-content">Originally posted by JAMES STEINER:
And who does the hom repairs? </div></BLOCKQUOTE>
Me and my trusty chainsaw. http://www.nonrev.net/infopop/emotic...on_biggrin.gif
"An airplane .... can't back up without help". Probably because no one thought to put a rear-view mirror on the flight deck. http://www.nonrev.net/infopop/emotic...on_biggrin.gif http://www.nonrev.net/infopop/emotic...on_biggrin.gif
Keep'em flying
