Thread: The nonrev's prayer

Ok, I mentioned this in another thread. I've FINALLY gotten around to posting it.

Background: Had some family in town on a Monday in MSP (they live in HNL, MSP is our hometown). By the end of the day on Monday, that last flight MSP-DEN was pretty full. Delta had a flight a few hours later, but that was also very full we had been told. But we went to the airport early, bought our ZEDs and listed at the Delta counter... just in case we had to try for that flight. If we didn't get those, it was a 6:00AM flight the next day if we were lucky, otherwise I'd probably have to take a vacation day off the next day. At the gate, I think we were the first two people on the list past the seat cutoff. We weren't hopeful, but had nothing to lose by trying. Miraculously, there were some noshows (I believe nonrevs) and we got the last two seats! Even if they weren't together, we were thrilled to get home. As soon as we were allowed to use our electronic devices, I typed up the nonrev's prayer, inspired by a scene in Cool Runnings (can't find it after a quick search on YouTube)

In the name of the airplane,
and of the gate agent,
and of the lucky nonrev.
Amen

Our nonrev, who art at the gate
jittery be thy name
thy seat will come
thy wait be done
at the airport as it is at gate seven
give us this gate agent their daily chocolate,
and forgive us those who had less seniority
as we forgive those who have outranked against us
and lead us not into the middle seat
but deliver us from getting stuck again.

For thine is the first class,
and the complimentary orange juice,
and the open seats
now and forever

Amen.