A public service for those of you planning to drive in the land of angels and freeways.
1. Traffic – LA is famous for its traffic. Even at 3 a.m. on a Sunday morning you could find yourself stuck in a massive freeway backup, caused entirely because Angelenos love waiting until the last possible second to… “merge left”. Think of LA traffic as the counterbalance in a city that has great weather almost year-round, beautiful beaches, scenic drives through mountains/canyons and "car" in its DNA.
2. Secret Traffic Route - There are no secret routes. If someone tells you about a secret route (that hardly anyone knows about) that will help you avoid traffic DO NO LISTEN! Trust me there is no secret route, and if there was, it would not involve going through El Segundo.
3. Angelenos refer to freeways by their numbers and the word ‘the’. So, it’s the 405 and the 10. Please note, that TV/radio traffic reports will often refer to those very same freeways by their names; so, it’s the San Diego Freeway and the Santa Monica freeway. Confusing? Yes!
4. Distance - Angelenos measure distances in time not miles. No Angeleno knows the miles it takes to go anywhere - what we know is how long it will take you to get there: “Long Beach, this time of day - maybe an hour and a half.
5. Rain - It doesn’t rain a lot in LA, but when it does, it throws the entire region off its game. With just the tiniest bit of precipitation, there are “Storm Watch” bulletins, all traffic slows down to a crawl……. drivers brake ‘uphill’, people discover their wipers are streaking and it’s basically the end of the world as Angelenos know it.
6. Anticipate - Angelenos honk their horns at vehicles that don’t move the split second the light changes – so anticipate the honking, NOT the light.
7. First Things First. You can literally see an In-N-Out when your plane lands at LAX. Pick up your convertible rental car, drive over, order your burger ‘animal style’ and enjoy LA.
See you on the 405. *laughing*
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