I stole this and I'm glad. It made me chortle!!

"Arrived at the airport 1 hour before departure for an international trip, I didnt check-in online so had to queue up and check in with an agent, had to pay extra because my bags were over the limit (as laid out on the airline's website). I asked for a free upgrade but was declined. Almost missed the flight because the security lines were too long , I was even more delayed because I didn't follow the instructions of security staff - I mean why should I have to take my shoes/belt off, have my liquids in appropriate see-through bags and have to take my laptop out of it's case?

On board, I asked another passenger would they move from the seat they had pre-booked so I could sit there - they told me no - the cheek of them. I then asked the FA could I move to an extra legroom seat because I dont like middle seats (which is what I was assigned at the airport). This request was also denied. The food was soggy and cold, so I opened up my smelly egg and chive and sardine sandwiches. There were no peanuts available either. FA's had a rude and surly attitude and spoke in a foreign language amongst themselves - how rude. Pilot's announcements were inaudible.


I decided to watch the in-flight enterainment and got dirty looks from the person in front of me any time I tried to push the button to change the channel, they also gave me the evil eye when I grasped their seat back to haul myself in and out of the row to access my cabin bags every 20 or so. The person on the aisle seat was not impressed either when I proceeded to paint my fingernails with strong smelling lacquer.


I got bitten by bedbugs on this flight and also discovered some head lice as a result of this flight. I had to pay for medical treatment at my destination because I hadn't purchased medical insurance. When I retrieved my bags from the carousel, they were damaged - again as a result of this flight.


When I proceeded through customs, I was fined because I had not declared some items in my bags. En route to the hotel, I was ripped off by an unscrupulous taxi-driver who decided the take a scenic route.


Who can I make a claim against for the above because NONE of this is my fault and I feel I deserve some type of compensation."